Have you been following the story of Talia Jane, the 25-year-old Yelp employee (whose Medium bio admits she’s “better at thinking about things than actually doing them”) who complained publicly online in an open letter to her boss about barely making a living?
So here I am, 25-years old, balancing all sorts of debt and trying to pave a life for myself that doesn’t involve crying in the bathtub every week. Every single one of my coworkers is struggling. They’re taking side jobs, they’re living at home. One of them started a GoFundMe because she couldn’t pay her rent.
She later updated her “Adulting is hard, you guys” article by boasting about how much notoriety she was getting (she has since removed the bit about her notoriety) and asking people to donate money to help her live (still in the update). Shortly thereafter, she was fired by Yelp, though a spokesperson says it was not for her complaining publicly about a site that makes its income allowing people to complain publicly.
Also, shortly thereafter, Stefanie Williams, an elderly professional of the ripe old age of 29 responded publicly to the whippersnapper. The entire article is a worthy read, but this stood out:
The issue is that this girl doesn’t think working a second job or getting roommates should be something she has to do in order to get ahead after three months of an entry level job in the most expensive city in the country. She believes Yelp should cover the cost of the financial decisions she’s made which include living alone and accepting that salary, two options that any sane person would never make. She believes she deserves these things that most of us would call luxuries. You expected to get what you thought you deserved rather than expected to work for what you had to earn. And that’s the problem entirely.
I heartily agree with the second author, and yes, I have serious objections to the first author’s mindset, although I, too, think adulting is hard sometimes.
What I object to is the “Here Millennials Go Again” tag being stapled to the first person and not to the second.
What I object to is “millennial” having a negative connotation.
What I object to is the argument of age.* For every Talia Jane, there’s a Kelsey Meyer.
I do not disagree there’s been a shift in what matters in western society. I write, teach, and speak about the fact that the carrot at the end of the stick we’ve chased for more than 400 years changes every 40 between two alternating worldviews.
But I vehemently disagree with the fact that this sense of entitlement is systemic of a birth-cohort group.
This week, I’ve had the pleasure of interviewing several twenty-something public school teachers, and I’ve met some of the most dedicated, hard-working, humble, helpful, kind-hearted, fiery-spirited professionals you’d ALL be happy to call part of your team.
Likewise this week, I’ve witnessed 40, 50, and 60-somethings act like spoiled, entitled little brats.
Millennials, as a birth-cohort group, don’t appear to share as much in common as we’d like when we complain about them.
There are hard-working, willing-to-help, eager-to-contribute people of all shapes, sizes, colors, ethnic backgrounds, and yes, ages… and they’re eager to be rewarded for their efforts.
There are also skimmers and shamers and knuckle-dragging, nose-picking narcissists who think they’re entitled to things they didn’t earn.
And they come in all shapes, sizes, colors, ethnic backgrounds, and yes, ages.
Yes, times have changed. Yes, the ways we think, act, and see the world have, to a degree or thirteen, changed.
Adulting is hard, you guys. Most of us – whether in our 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, or 100s, – do it anyway, and we measure success not by how many likes or shares we get but by how big a difference we make in our community.
Sometimes that community includes our city, sometimes our company, sometimes our family, sometimes our soul, but it always includes a commitment to adulting.
(*The one exception to this is middle school students. I can’t help but think when they look at me, they’re sizing me up as a future source of food. Am I alone in this?)
