Tomorrow, it’ll be a month since Dad died. Sometimes, it feels like it was five minutes ago and sometimes, five years. Does that make any sense?
You want to know the biggest thing I’ve learned in the month since my Dad died?
That while squeaky wheels and angry trolls may grab headlines, most people are extraordinarily kind, generous, decent people. They’re good neighbors, friends, and family.
Even as the world sometimes feels like it’s choosing sides around us, I’m continually reminded of the power of community by good deeds shining in a weary world.
- Friends driving hours to attend the visitation
- Clients sending flowers and making memorial donations to Mom and Dad’s church and the Champaign-Urbana Autism Network
- Family members giving us hours of their time
- And you – so many of you whom I’ve never met – writing lovely letters and cards and emails.
Thank you for your friendship. Our grief was blanketed by your prayers, kind words, and deeds.
Just yesterday, a piece of priority mail arrived stamped “DO NOT BEND.” Our family photographer, Jessie Starkey, sent me not one of hers but one of mine:
That first day, my brother John moved Dad’s first tractor into our front yard, and I captured this from my old room in our old farmhouse on December 12th after driving through the night. I borrowed some of Patty Griffin’s words because I couldn’t find any of my own.
Now, thanks to the kindness and generosity of a friend, I’ll have them forever. I bent. I didn’t break. I’m ready to look forward through the windshield, get back to work, and pause occasionally to check the rearview mirror and remember how I got here and who helped me.
I get back to work in awe:
- Of my mother’s strength
- Of my brother’s work ethic and generosity
- Of my sister’s wisdom and helpfulness
- Of my community and good deeds in weary worlds
We start writing again tomorrow. Heck, I barely stopped writing (in my head), but I just didn’t have the strength to write (with my fingers).
One thing I learned was just how much our father shared with others… and it’s our aim in 2017 to do the same with you. I reckon we can give away around 94.5% of our stuff for free and still pay our team well and serve our clients well.
So that’s what we’re going to do, and we’re going to do it for Dad.
It’s time to get back to work.
Tomorrow’s one month to the day… and I’ll be right here… trying to help… I hope you will be, too.
